Advice College Admissions Officers Give Their Own Kids

While most parents find the college process stressful and bewildering, we interviewed some who have a unique perspective: admissions officers who are also the parents of teenagers and college students themselves. They know that while parents can’t control where their child is admitted, they can influence whether their teenager views the college process as stressful and frustrating or as an exciting time filled with opportunity.

These admissions officers tell their own children that high school is far more than just a pathway to college — it’s a time for maturation, self-discovery, learning and fun. They encourage their teens to embrace activities and courses that reflect who they genuinely are, not who they think colleges want them to be.

We interviewed admissions officers at Allegheny College, Georgia Tech, Kenyon College, M.I.T., Penn State, Vanderbilt, U.C.L.A., U.N.C.-Chapel Hill and the University of Richmond. Every one of them emphasized the importance of their child finding a college that fits, not the other way around.

With throngs of high school juniors about to embark on college visits over their spring breaks, here is their advice.

Diane Anci, vice president for enrollment management and dean of admissions and financial aid, Kenyon College

“Before the college brochures make their way into our house, I plan to ask my son a series of questions that I hope will help him define the type of collegiate environment in which he will be most happy and do his best work. Knowing who you are provides a protective armor in a process that can be overwhelming. Not only are you inundated with communication from the colleges, everyone you know has an opinion of what is a good college and what is not, and they feel very free to express it. It’s empowering for a teen to be able to say, ‘I’m the kind of person who…’ ”

Here are some of the questions she plans to ask her own kid:

Do you like the idea of being the smartest student in your class or surrounded by really smart kids?
Is it important to find a specific course of study or to have a wide range of options?
Do you like the idea of meeting five new people a day or finding five people who will be your friends for life?
Are you drawn to familiar people and places or are you excited by a new region, meeting students from across the nation and around the world?
Do you prefer to work in a highly collaborative environment or are you energized by competition?

Clark Brigger, executive director for undergraduate admissions, Penn State University

“I tell my kids, ‘Do not wait for the deadline to submit your applications.’ There’s a rule in our house that I pay for the applications completed before Labor Day, but after that, my children are responsible for the fees. Getting those applications in early is the best way to reduce stress senior year. I want them to do well in their academic courses and extracurricular activities and to enjoy that last year of high school. Why spend it struggling with applications?”

“As an admissions officer, when that deadline comes around, I see a huge spike in applications. That’s when the procrastinators send them in. It’s advantageous to get ahead of the bubble. Think about it strategically: there are thousands of applications and essays to get through. If you get yours in early, the reader may be more relaxed and in a better mood at that point in the process.”